1 more week to go
@ 12:21 AM
One more week to go before my mom's wedding day. I'm not sure how I feel about this still but I don't want to burden my minds with it. I still think this is going too fast for me. I guess I feel that I'm losing grip of teh things that I hold dear. There is too much change that have been going on that I'm becoming scared of change, even 1 tiny bit of change. Is it because I am too comfortable in my comfort zone? Everytime I think about it, I have short breaths, as though I'm having panic attacks.
I want to be okay with this, for my mom. But I need to be okay with it as well, for me. I don't understand why I have to go through all these before any other person that I know. Why can't it happen to someone else, before me, so that I have an example?
I feel really bad because everyone is making an effort. I don't feel like I'm making enough effort. Especially when I am doubting, it kinds of show that I don't even try making an effort to make it easier.
Nadiah.
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